Sooooo...lately it seems people from home have been asking me who I am dating, or if I am dating anyone. I dont know why people think they can be involved in every aspect of my personal life, but apparently its hot commodity. This post is to inform everyone that my status is...and will be for a hot minute...SINGLE.
HERE ARE MY REASONS WHY:
Im not ready to love, Im rocking my freedom/ single life out;)Im not over the ex completely, Im scared of getting hurt. Im doing just fine...why rock the boat?
I dont trust men because they all are equal scum. I have not found anyone that interests me, that likes me the same. Finally, Ive had love and it never turns out great, why would I jump back in? Enough said.
FOR THOSE CURIOUS SOULS OUT THERE...this is what i look for in a boyfriend...and these characteristics are def. not found in Columbus, OH.
A good boy with the bad bay edgyness. This includes a wardrobe of extremely preppy clothes(i.e. polos, sweaters, khakis, sperrys) HOWEVER pac sun must be included into this. (i.e. hurley, o'neill, fox, famous stars and straps, DC, chuck taylors) Yeah the works. Attitude wise, they have to be a well mannered guy. Pure and decent at heart...someone I can trust. With this guy...lying should never cross my mind. They have to be able to kick it chill though. If my guy is not willing to work out or jog with me...thats lazy and I want someone to have toSometimes, I just like to cuddle and watch tv. I need a hopeless romantic 50/50. I also need someone tough...I want the perfect blend. For me, my type is tall and skinny with not blonde, but not brown hair. Additionally, this person better love water. I live by the lake, and I am a water baby. If you cant swim..you aint gonna make it with me in the summer time. I jet ski, parasail, go tubing, boating, just everything...and I dont feel like having to carry a life jacket around with. That would just be a nuisance. Violence?? Well my perfect man better know how to fight for me, because I can fight my way out of a paper bag...but temper wise that better be the only time he gets in a fight. Violences scares me. One final characteristic my man must possess is a love and i mean a LOVE for music. They better be able to sing with me at all times on the fly, and dance if they need too;) Other than that...they need to be absolutely 100% attachment free of psycho ex's. hahaha. Well I cant be too picky:) See why you cant find those characteristics in college boys?! haha
Forever and Always, Danielle
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
a post i wrote in january on christmas break...
Being in a top sorority on campus has taught me many things such as…
1. putting on enough bronzer so that I look like im walking the victorias secret runway at all times
2. teasing my hair high enough to be a dolly parton look alike
3. reeling boys in close enough to smell my purfume then setting them free
4. making any other girl jealous of my life(even though she shouldn’t be)
5. how to get into a bar with a fake id flawlessly
6. how to be fake when I need to, and real at all other times
7. how to live on the wild side of life
8. heartbreak
9. breaking boys hearts and finallly….
10. consuming large amounts of alcohol til you blackout
I would say in my head that those 10 things would be enough to keep me away from whatever organization was helping me to achieve those qualities. However aside from those 10 things that may reinforce the stereotype of a sorority girl…there are many things people wouldn’t consider in their heads when thinking of a sorority.
I also learned…
1. how to be a good friend
2. things not to do, when your supposed to be a good friend
3. sisterhood, being more than just a friend
4. that doing community service brings everyone closer to their heart
5. love
6. boys are just fragments of our lives
7. studying is above all…haha mayyybe
8. never do something you wouldn’t want done to you
9. sorries mean nothing unless they are sincere
10. sorority is just a name for a close group of friends, that no one…and I mean no one will understand unless they are apart of the group.
You may ask…how did this girl gain all this knowledge? Well the truth be told. It came from a long discovery of who I really am. The word stereotype used to get to me…bad. Now, I don’t see it that way. People could stereotype me for just about anything…being white, pretty, ugly, attention, depression, suicidal, the nice girl, dumb, smart, fake, real. The word stereotype was invented in my opinion because some dumb ass was jealous of someone elses life…so in order to make that person mad, he generalized. “Oh well your just that stupid guy who is apart of lamda alpha suckit…I heard all them guys are douches…” In life, hearing those kinds of things said about you hurts. It gets to you. It make you think that you are less than who you are. I know hearing those things about me made me feel that way.
I know anyone who reads my shit knows…I have some serious depression issues. Aside from my heart condition that causes me to have anxiety, the depression I have comes from a more deeper issue than that…my life.
I grew up pretty normal until I was about 11. When I turned 11, my whole world in my eyes fell apart. I watched my dad leave on a business trip and never come home. I watched my mom cry everyday. I later learned he cheated on her 5 years into their mariage, and again the year before he left…up until he left. I literally was clueless on how to feel. I dealt with the pain surrounding me by keeping things inside. Crying was a word I knew of, but the action of crying never was acted out by me. On top of all of this…I left on a trip with my dad during the divorce period once he came back around, and I decided that I didn’t want to be away from home anymore so I begged … and I mean begged my dad to bring me back to my moms place. I thought that my dad was going to be sooo upset with me for asking him to bring me home to mom, but he wasn’t. I couldn’t figure that out. After all was said and done, I figured out why he wasn’t mad. He wanted to catch my mother on a date. He got what he wanted, but he didn’t have the temper to deal with what he wanted. He hit my mom knocked her over, and beat my moms date(almost leaving him lifeless). Violence, abandonment, lost trust, broken love…these are all things that a an 11 yr old should not see or feel, but I did. This is where my depression is rooted. I live in my past. I know im in the future, but the way I approach my life is that the past is gonna repeat itself. I know what you’re thinking…well if you know that, forget it…don’t be depressed and move on with your life. See the thing is, is that I don’t recognize it. These behaviors such as keeping my guard up are self conscious. They happen whether I want them too or not.
I came home this last week from college thinking I was gonna quit. I realized I needed a break when I had a bottle of pills in one hand and the other wiping tears from my eyes. I wanted to just give up. If I died all the horrible feelings that I have been feeling for awhile would just go away. I knew I didn’t want that, but what other choice did I have when I was choking to get words out because I couldn’t breathe. Then I thought…I have a choice to be happy. So I gave it up all at once. I came home to get happy. Little did I know that getting happy wasn’t just that easy. Giving up on all you know and quitting something that is gonna get you far in life like college isnt gonna make you happy. You make you happy. Nobody can make you feel down without your consent. This was my problem. I was letting everyone around me make me feel down.
I guess with depression you have your up and down days. I came home that’s when I really started thinking about my life, and what I could do to better it. I really thought that being in a sorority was stressing me out. However, I have such a loving group of girls who constantly blew my phone up while I was gone to make sure I was alright. Its my actions. I have to take responsibility and account for myself. The common fallacy is this…people like to follow the crowd, and that was just what I was doing. Getting wasted every night, doing everything with everyone else and not doing anything for myself. I need to love and be apart of my sorority, but learn to separate myself and get better.
Another thing that stressed me out completely, was AMR and WB. They constantly made fun of me for being a sorority girl, and maybe I am in certain ways, but that def is not all that I am. I am a good person with a good heart, and I was raised by the best mom in the entire world. I AM MORE THAN JUST A SORORITY GIRL. I don’t need them to constantly make fun of greek life. They most likely are just jealous they don’t understand it, or they are not apart of it. Anyways, fuck them on that situation…even though I love them dearly as friends.
Speaking of them, they prob saved my life a little when it came to fall semester. I was barreling myself down to the bottom with this dep/anx. It was horrible. I drank almost everyday, and ran myself into the ground. It was not until I reunited with all 3 of the boys at a bar that I realized I needed to be better than that.
Right now…my course of action is not about boys however. Its about happiness. I am totally reverting my life to get on the right track. I want to think happy, be happy, and act happy. All of which is gonna take some time, but I think I know how to get to the point. When I came home I saw my dr. about how seriously down I have been, and he is the man let me tell you. He put me on this natural plan to overcome depression. It starts with changing my lifestyle. No drinking myself retarded(obvs), no drunk smoking, no destructive habits, eating 100% healthy, and exercising daily. Awesome! Fuck my life basically was what I was thinking when he was telling me this. However, I don’t want to be on meds, so I am going to embrace this idea, fuck my life, get over this, and be happy. Its def not going to be easy, but eh? Is life easy, no! so heyyy I have a shot...
its fuckin gametime! not now chief im in the fucking zone! elle is coming back.
heres the my new policies for life.
1. fuck boys, because they all want to fuck you over in some way
2. get the grades, because those can actually take you places
3. party hard, when you get the chance too.
and most importantly, enjoy your life…you’re lucky to have one after all.
forever and always, danielle
1. putting on enough bronzer so that I look like im walking the victorias secret runway at all times
2. teasing my hair high enough to be a dolly parton look alike
3. reeling boys in close enough to smell my purfume then setting them free
4. making any other girl jealous of my life(even though she shouldn’t be)
5. how to get into a bar with a fake id flawlessly
6. how to be fake when I need to, and real at all other times
7. how to live on the wild side of life
8. heartbreak
9. breaking boys hearts and finallly….
10. consuming large amounts of alcohol til you blackout
I would say in my head that those 10 things would be enough to keep me away from whatever organization was helping me to achieve those qualities. However aside from those 10 things that may reinforce the stereotype of a sorority girl…there are many things people wouldn’t consider in their heads when thinking of a sorority.
I also learned…
1. how to be a good friend
2. things not to do, when your supposed to be a good friend
3. sisterhood, being more than just a friend
4. that doing community service brings everyone closer to their heart
5. love
6. boys are just fragments of our lives
7. studying is above all…haha mayyybe
8. never do something you wouldn’t want done to you
9. sorries mean nothing unless they are sincere
10. sorority is just a name for a close group of friends, that no one…and I mean no one will understand unless they are apart of the group.
You may ask…how did this girl gain all this knowledge? Well the truth be told. It came from a long discovery of who I really am. The word stereotype used to get to me…bad. Now, I don’t see it that way. People could stereotype me for just about anything…being white, pretty, ugly, attention, depression, suicidal, the nice girl, dumb, smart, fake, real. The word stereotype was invented in my opinion because some dumb ass was jealous of someone elses life…so in order to make that person mad, he generalized. “Oh well your just that stupid guy who is apart of lamda alpha suckit…I heard all them guys are douches…” In life, hearing those kinds of things said about you hurts. It gets to you. It make you think that you are less than who you are. I know hearing those things about me made me feel that way.
I know anyone who reads my shit knows…I have some serious depression issues. Aside from my heart condition that causes me to have anxiety, the depression I have comes from a more deeper issue than that…my life.
I grew up pretty normal until I was about 11. When I turned 11, my whole world in my eyes fell apart. I watched my dad leave on a business trip and never come home. I watched my mom cry everyday. I later learned he cheated on her 5 years into their mariage, and again the year before he left…up until he left. I literally was clueless on how to feel. I dealt with the pain surrounding me by keeping things inside. Crying was a word I knew of, but the action of crying never was acted out by me. On top of all of this…I left on a trip with my dad during the divorce period once he came back around, and I decided that I didn’t want to be away from home anymore so I begged … and I mean begged my dad to bring me back to my moms place. I thought that my dad was going to be sooo upset with me for asking him to bring me home to mom, but he wasn’t. I couldn’t figure that out. After all was said and done, I figured out why he wasn’t mad. He wanted to catch my mother on a date. He got what he wanted, but he didn’t have the temper to deal with what he wanted. He hit my mom knocked her over, and beat my moms date(almost leaving him lifeless). Violence, abandonment, lost trust, broken love…these are all things that a an 11 yr old should not see or feel, but I did. This is where my depression is rooted. I live in my past. I know im in the future, but the way I approach my life is that the past is gonna repeat itself. I know what you’re thinking…well if you know that, forget it…don’t be depressed and move on with your life. See the thing is, is that I don’t recognize it. These behaviors such as keeping my guard up are self conscious. They happen whether I want them too or not.
I came home this last week from college thinking I was gonna quit. I realized I needed a break when I had a bottle of pills in one hand and the other wiping tears from my eyes. I wanted to just give up. If I died all the horrible feelings that I have been feeling for awhile would just go away. I knew I didn’t want that, but what other choice did I have when I was choking to get words out because I couldn’t breathe. Then I thought…I have a choice to be happy. So I gave it up all at once. I came home to get happy. Little did I know that getting happy wasn’t just that easy. Giving up on all you know and quitting something that is gonna get you far in life like college isnt gonna make you happy. You make you happy. Nobody can make you feel down without your consent. This was my problem. I was letting everyone around me make me feel down.
I guess with depression you have your up and down days. I came home that’s when I really started thinking about my life, and what I could do to better it. I really thought that being in a sorority was stressing me out. However, I have such a loving group of girls who constantly blew my phone up while I was gone to make sure I was alright. Its my actions. I have to take responsibility and account for myself. The common fallacy is this…people like to follow the crowd, and that was just what I was doing. Getting wasted every night, doing everything with everyone else and not doing anything for myself. I need to love and be apart of my sorority, but learn to separate myself and get better.
Another thing that stressed me out completely, was AMR and WB. They constantly made fun of me for being a sorority girl, and maybe I am in certain ways, but that def is not all that I am. I am a good person with a good heart, and I was raised by the best mom in the entire world. I AM MORE THAN JUST A SORORITY GIRL. I don’t need them to constantly make fun of greek life. They most likely are just jealous they don’t understand it, or they are not apart of it. Anyways, fuck them on that situation…even though I love them dearly as friends.
Speaking of them, they prob saved my life a little when it came to fall semester. I was barreling myself down to the bottom with this dep/anx. It was horrible. I drank almost everyday, and ran myself into the ground. It was not until I reunited with all 3 of the boys at a bar that I realized I needed to be better than that.
Right now…my course of action is not about boys however. Its about happiness. I am totally reverting my life to get on the right track. I want to think happy, be happy, and act happy. All of which is gonna take some time, but I think I know how to get to the point. When I came home I saw my dr. about how seriously down I have been, and he is the man let me tell you. He put me on this natural plan to overcome depression. It starts with changing my lifestyle. No drinking myself retarded(obvs), no drunk smoking, no destructive habits, eating 100% healthy, and exercising daily. Awesome! Fuck my life basically was what I was thinking when he was telling me this. However, I don’t want to be on meds, so I am going to embrace this idea, fuck my life, get over this, and be happy. Its def not going to be easy, but eh? Is life easy, no! so heyyy I have a shot...
its fuckin gametime! not now chief im in the fucking zone! elle is coming back.
heres the my new policies for life.
1. fuck boys, because they all want to fuck you over in some way
2. get the grades, because those can actually take you places
3. party hard, when you get the chance too.
and most importantly, enjoy your life…you’re lucky to have one after all.
forever and always, danielle
Saturday, February 13, 2010
One things for sure...You dont have to worry.
This weekend is Valentines weekend…for the first time in awhile I don’t feel anxious about it. I thought it would be worse because of my single social status I have rightfully claimed, but its not. Its actually refreshing to know a few things I wont be doing on this hallmark holiday compared to previous ones. While I am sitting wherever I may be…I wont have to be worried about the spontaneousness of someone else surprising me, or me surprising them. I also wont have to worry about corking my body into a sexy piece of lingerie to seduce someone, or getting whipped cream eaten off me like Im a dessert. Its completely life altering to endure a single Valentines day experience. Instead of calling it Valentines day, Im came up with a few names of my own.
1. Very Happy I don’t have a Boyfriend Day!
2. Independent Woman Day!
3. Candy Hearts, my ass! Day
5. Screw you hallmark! Day
6. Boycotting lingerie Day
7. Single and loving it Day
8. Happy to be me Day
9. Bottle of Wine Day
10. Who needs a guy anyways Day
Forever and Always, Danielle
1. Very Happy I don’t have a Boyfriend Day!
2. Independent Woman Day!
3. Candy Hearts, my ass! Day
5. Screw you hallmark! Day
6. Boycotting lingerie Day
7. Single and loving it Day
8. Happy to be me Day
9. Bottle of Wine Day
10. Who needs a guy anyways Day
Forever and Always, Danielle
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Friday, January 15, 2010
boom boom pow, that bitch be jocking my style.
If I had a penny for every time I felt like a dumb ass girl...I would be rich. It seems to me that I am just incompetent. Boys, school, life, anything. I just dont get the concept of it all apparently. Currently, I am listening to sad depressing music and writing lyrics. I swear Im not emo;) Short post, but thats what is on my mind:/
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Its been awhile...
With the start of classes for the quarter beginning, and all the busy stuff going on in my life i have not had time to blog. So many things have happened, but i wouldnt have it any other way. You know that time in your life...everybody has felt this feeling before...When you just sit back and watch life spin around you at 309749869863 miles an hour, and the only thing you can do is smile. Ive been doing a lot of that lately. Things are just going where they want to go, end of story.
Sorority life is back in full swing:) A TG tonight with Theta Chi makes me ohhhhh sooooo happy. I am so glad to be back, but at the same time I am finding that balancing my time has become a chaos. The New Years resolution states that I will only drink on weekends, I will work out everyday, I will do well in school...thats A LOT to live up too. I feel like Cait and I are becoming extremely distant:( Thats sad, since we spent everyday together last quarter. The only thing I can come up with is this is a new chapter of my life, and theres a reason why that is happening.
Best Buy, or something else...haha. The first day of classes I decided...fuck my 17 inch I weigh more than anything in the world laptop, Im buying a new smaller one. So AMR and KDK took me to BestBuy to help me shop. I felt bad because the roads were awful, but we made it just fine. So were there looking around, and my original plan was to buy a netbook. They are smaller than a book, and that would have been fabulous, but I found a 13 inch Toshiba regular laptop...I didnt know what to do. I decided to walk the store pondering my decision. AMR and I were traveling all around as I am the most indecisive person in this world. I couldnt pick what I want if my life depended on it. Haha. Well we were traveling in the tv area(Andys place, lol)when my mind started drifting off my decision of buying a computer to thinking about me and him. KDK approached us, he was not happy. I felt really bad, KDK always feels alienated when the three of us venture out together. Im gonna have to fix that:) I dont want to lose him. KDK walked away, and thats when word vomit came up..."I think I want to be your girlfriend." I said to AMR. "We this is something were gonna have to talk about." he said. Good. I finally said what I wanted too.
That night...it was official. I thought I didnt want a boyfriend, because of all the stress of sorority life, and AMR's ex, and all the drama that surrounds...but I do. He makes me the happiest person when Im around him, I dont want to lose him. There has to be a way for me to do both:) I hope he can deal with me being stubborn;) The only problem is...I have serious trust issues. I am soooo scared to fall in love again, it has broke me too many times. I have such bad anxiety, I just hope I can let my guard down.
PLANS FOR NEXT YEAR! Sooooo tis the season to be looking for a new place to love for next school year, and I Danielle WILL NOT SPEND ANOTHER YEAR IN ALPHA PHI SORORITY HOUSE! Im done. I absolutely cannot stand all the rules, I am 20 yrs old, and a junior in college, I do what I want! haha, but seriously. Anyways, because of my bestest friend KDK we decided next year were gonna kick it. Whether we find a 4 bdrm and all of us WB, AMR, KDK, and myself live together, or we find a 2 bdrm and just KDK and I. We will figure it out. Living all together poses one problem...AMR and I are official now, so technically I would be living with my significant other. You see, for most girls...this would be an issue. For me, not so much. Im a pretty laid back chick, and AMR is the same in a guys form, I dont really see much going wrong. I think next year will be one great time if it really does work out. We found this great 4brdrm place in Georgetown, but we wont know if we can live there until April:/ We will see what happens.
Forever and Always, Danielle
P.S. Had a panic attack last night...not quite sure why? Im so glad KDK was here, I was freaking. I fucking hate them. Panic attacks feel like death, and Im soooo happy right now. I just need to stop thinking all together:)
Sorority life is back in full swing:) A TG tonight with Theta Chi makes me ohhhhh sooooo happy. I am so glad to be back, but at the same time I am finding that balancing my time has become a chaos. The New Years resolution states that I will only drink on weekends, I will work out everyday, I will do well in school...thats A LOT to live up too. I feel like Cait and I are becoming extremely distant:( Thats sad, since we spent everyday together last quarter. The only thing I can come up with is this is a new chapter of my life, and theres a reason why that is happening.
Best Buy, or something else...haha. The first day of classes I decided...fuck my 17 inch I weigh more than anything in the world laptop, Im buying a new smaller one. So AMR and KDK took me to BestBuy to help me shop. I felt bad because the roads were awful, but we made it just fine. So were there looking around, and my original plan was to buy a netbook. They are smaller than a book, and that would have been fabulous, but I found a 13 inch Toshiba regular laptop...I didnt know what to do. I decided to walk the store pondering my decision. AMR and I were traveling all around as I am the most indecisive person in this world. I couldnt pick what I want if my life depended on it. Haha. Well we were traveling in the tv area(Andys place, lol)when my mind started drifting off my decision of buying a computer to thinking about me and him. KDK approached us, he was not happy. I felt really bad, KDK always feels alienated when the three of us venture out together. Im gonna have to fix that:) I dont want to lose him. KDK walked away, and thats when word vomit came up..."I think I want to be your girlfriend." I said to AMR. "We this is something were gonna have to talk about." he said. Good. I finally said what I wanted too.
That night...it was official. I thought I didnt want a boyfriend, because of all the stress of sorority life, and AMR's ex, and all the drama that surrounds...but I do. He makes me the happiest person when Im around him, I dont want to lose him. There has to be a way for me to do both:) I hope he can deal with me being stubborn;) The only problem is...I have serious trust issues. I am soooo scared to fall in love again, it has broke me too many times. I have such bad anxiety, I just hope I can let my guard down.
PLANS FOR NEXT YEAR! Sooooo tis the season to be looking for a new place to love for next school year, and I Danielle WILL NOT SPEND ANOTHER YEAR IN ALPHA PHI SORORITY HOUSE! Im done. I absolutely cannot stand all the rules, I am 20 yrs old, and a junior in college, I do what I want! haha, but seriously. Anyways, because of my bestest friend KDK we decided next year were gonna kick it. Whether we find a 4 bdrm and all of us WB, AMR, KDK, and myself live together, or we find a 2 bdrm and just KDK and I. We will figure it out. Living all together poses one problem...AMR and I are official now, so technically I would be living with my significant other. You see, for most girls...this would be an issue. For me, not so much. Im a pretty laid back chick, and AMR is the same in a guys form, I dont really see much going wrong. I think next year will be one great time if it really does work out. We found this great 4brdrm place in Georgetown, but we wont know if we can live there until April:/ We will see what happens.
Forever and Always, Danielle
P.S. Had a panic attack last night...not quite sure why? Im so glad KDK was here, I was freaking. I fucking hate them. Panic attacks feel like death, and Im soooo happy right now. I just need to stop thinking all together:)
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Happy Fucking New Year! WTF is total?
New Years turned out to be better than I imagined even though we didnt venture to NYC. We went out shopping, and made our own rocking new years eve party right here in Columbus, Ohio. Let me just put it this way...I only made it to see the ball drop because of AMR. About five minutes or shortly after the ball the dropped I was passed out on the floor of KDK's room. Lovely...I guess that goes to show I cannot keep up with a 250 lb man. FML!
If you or anyone else thinks this night went down drama free, you are saddly mistake. There was plenty of drama to fill anyones hearts with desire. Where to begin...?
First of all, it sucked going into the night because my friend AMRs ex thinks we are dating. AC(ex) got my number.I just wanted him to be happy with her. So I told him that...I think it made him mad, but I was just being honest. Anyways, the night prevailed. I thought it was pretty funny that all of AMR's brothers were telling me to please give AMR a shot because they liked me better than her. Although its nice to be liked, I dont want to take over anyones place. I am me, I deserve my own place in someones life...not someone elses.
To add to drama gate 2009, shortly after the bringing in of the new year I passed out on KDK's floor like I said. Im not sure of the kind of drama that went down, because I was out for the count, but I know AMR and KDK got into it. First of all, they were both drunk. Second of all, both of them have separate feelings for me. Finally, I love them both to death so them arguing is just hilarious. Boys will be boys. That was the least of my worries.
somebody started texting me around 3am? Yep, AC. I mean this girl doesnt stop...Im sitting right next to AMR as she is blowing my phone up. I was getting pissed, but its whatevs. I always try to stay classy so I was being extremely nice to her. I just kept thinking to myself we are never gonna date. I can like this boy all I want, but Im never gonna be able to get over the whole situation. AMR starts texting her to get her to leave me alone, and it worked thank god. He was being a complete ass to her it was sooo funny. Theres this youtube video that we he and I always watch together about this guy with tourettes...so we quote it constantly. Especially the line where he is talking about total cereal. It came to a point where he texted her the line, "DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT TOTAL!" I was dying inside. The best text response ever on her part, "WTF IS TOTAL!?" Epic.
After all the drama had settled, I was laying close to AMR. I wanted him to know that I was not gonna go anywhere when school started. I know he has this fear that as soon as school starts up again that I am gonna go back to my sorority life and completely forget about him. #1.Im not an a-hole #2. I like him #3. That would be really hard to do. So I told him how I felt. I think he appreciated it. One question is up in the air though. Are we dating? After I told him that, I thought about it for the longest time. I dont want to rush anything at all. Its whatever he wants. Additionally, I dont want to replace AC. That would be outlandish, ridic, and painful in the end. Not worth it. I guess I might want to figure this out.
Overall, I think I had a pretty great New Years. There are many things I would like to remember and forget about 2009. All I can say is I am going to take those times that I always want with me, and hold them close. As for everything else that I never want to think about again...that is getting left in 2009. Im looking for to spending 2010 the best I can.
Forever and Always, Danielle
P.S. New Years Resolution
1. Run a 1/2 marathon by July
2. 4.0 gpa goal for the next 2 quarters
3. kick the habit of smoking
4. drinking excessively is in the past(hopefully)or it will be
5. finding one person i cant live without and making them mine
cheers!
If you or anyone else thinks this night went down drama free, you are saddly mistake. There was plenty of drama to fill anyones hearts with desire. Where to begin...?
First of all, it sucked going into the night because my friend AMRs ex thinks we are dating. AC(ex) got my number.I just wanted him to be happy with her. So I told him that...I think it made him mad, but I was just being honest. Anyways, the night prevailed. I thought it was pretty funny that all of AMR's brothers were telling me to please give AMR a shot because they liked me better than her. Although its nice to be liked, I dont want to take over anyones place. I am me, I deserve my own place in someones life...not someone elses.
To add to drama gate 2009, shortly after the bringing in of the new year I passed out on KDK's floor like I said. Im not sure of the kind of drama that went down, because I was out for the count, but I know AMR and KDK got into it. First of all, they were both drunk. Second of all, both of them have separate feelings for me. Finally, I love them both to death so them arguing is just hilarious. Boys will be boys. That was the least of my worries.
somebody started texting me around 3am? Yep, AC. I mean this girl doesnt stop...Im sitting right next to AMR as she is blowing my phone up. I was getting pissed, but its whatevs. I always try to stay classy so I was being extremely nice to her. I just kept thinking to myself we are never gonna date. I can like this boy all I want, but Im never gonna be able to get over the whole situation. AMR starts texting her to get her to leave me alone, and it worked thank god. He was being a complete ass to her it was sooo funny. Theres this youtube video that we he and I always watch together about this guy with tourettes...so we quote it constantly. Especially the line where he is talking about total cereal. It came to a point where he texted her the line, "DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT TOTAL!" I was dying inside. The best text response ever on her part, "WTF IS TOTAL!?" Epic.
After all the drama had settled, I was laying close to AMR. I wanted him to know that I was not gonna go anywhere when school started. I know he has this fear that as soon as school starts up again that I am gonna go back to my sorority life and completely forget about him. #1.Im not an a-hole #2. I like him #3. That would be really hard to do. So I told him how I felt. I think he appreciated it. One question is up in the air though. Are we dating? After I told him that, I thought about it for the longest time. I dont want to rush anything at all. Its whatever he wants. Additionally, I dont want to replace AC. That would be outlandish, ridic, and painful in the end. Not worth it. I guess I might want to figure this out.
Overall, I think I had a pretty great New Years. There are many things I would like to remember and forget about 2009. All I can say is I am going to take those times that I always want with me, and hold them close. As for everything else that I never want to think about again...that is getting left in 2009. Im looking for to spending 2010 the best I can.
Forever and Always, Danielle
P.S. New Years Resolution
1. Run a 1/2 marathon by July
2. 4.0 gpa goal for the next 2 quarters
3. kick the habit of smoking
4. drinking excessively is in the past(hopefully)or it will be
5. finding one person i cant live without and making them mine
cheers!
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